The Red Flag In A Man To Look For That Will Surprise You

Did I get your attention? Well, if you are currently dating, being aware of this red flag may be something you’ll want to thank me for later. In fact, I really wish someone would have told me about it so I didn’t have to learn the hard way. Actually, I take that back. I have no regrets. We live this life to learn, grow and pass along a little wisdom along the way, in hopes others will do the same. Life happens. And, if you’re smart, you’ll take all those lemons and create a lemonade stand. Bittersweet, but such a refreshing concept.

It’s what we all want – someone we can grow old with who is perfect for us. Guess what – the red flag I’m talking about is in that one sentence. But, that whole sentence isn’t the red flag. Sounds confusing, I know. Read that all again and maybe it will make sense. If it doesn’t, don’t worry. I’m about to tell you that one red flag to look for in a man and that one red flag, may be exactly what you were really wanting and looking for in your potential soulmate. And now, here’s your glass of lemonade.

It’s the one you’ve been wishing for and dreaming about your whole life. You’ve seen all the Disney movies and now you’re wanting to lose your shoe in hopes that Prince Charming will arrive and sweep you off your feet. No, you don’t and let me tell you why. But, before I begin, let me tell you about the “perfect man.” He’s dreamy, charming and says all the right things. He makes you feel like the most beautiful girl in the world and bends over backwards for you. This man makes everyone swoon from the moment they meet him. He’s romantic and his kind and thoughtful gestures are endless. There really doesn’t seem like anything is wrong with him. He’s perfect and that perfection, is the red flag. There, you can relax now . . . I finally said it.

We all have a “thing” that stands out to you and most of the people around you. The longer you know someone, the more quirks, annoyances and flaws start to surface. It’s what makes us all human and unique in our own way. Even the best of friends annoy each other. And, if you’re lucky, your best friend will tell you the good, the bad and the ugly – knowing it may not be what you want to hear, but need to hear.

Finding someone who complements you should be the ultimate goal. Look for the one that shares their opinions and thoughts, regardless if you agree with them or not. You can agree to disagree, as long as it’s done in a healthy way and isn’t a difference of core values. Your taste in music, food, television and movie choices may be different and it’s okay. An honest opinion is healthy and attractive. Those differences can possibly even open your eyes to something new. And if not, again, it’s okay. Someone that shares your life but doesn’t try to live your life, is healthy. You want a man that doesn’t say and do things that are not genuine to who he really is. If he shares those core values you do, such as honesty, integrity, love of family and friends and respect, he’s a keeper. Being kind, while calling you out when necessary, is someone who is keeping you accountable and wanting you to be the best version of you. That’s a beautiful thing.

I’ve known so many men who act differently, depending on who they are around. These men may have a more playful and flirtatious side that you don’t get a chance to see. They act loyal and loving all the time around you, but the minute they get away, the mask comes off. Other woman are often jealous of your relationship and compare their man to yours. They are envious and wish their man did all the amazing things that yours did. You may catch your man in a lie, but they quickly have you feeling guilty for thinking they would do something to hurt you. I mean, they love you so much. They treat you amazing all the time. You rarely disagree and argue. The man that has an answer for everything and has you feeling like the “crazy one” or second guessing them, is one to be aware of.

Life should be a treat, not a trick. You don’t want to spend your life wondering if the mask is ever going to fall off. Bottom line, you want a Real. Good. Man. He may drive you crazy at times and he may do and say things that you disagree with . . . but he never has you questioning his integrity. Why? Because what you see is what you get. He loves you and respects you in front of you and behind you. He values truth and honesty and won’t settle for anything less. He will tell you when you are doing something wrong or driving him crazy and doesn’t pretend that everything is perfect. Why? Because you’re not perfect, he’s not perfect and life is not perfect. He’s perfectly, in-perfect and so are you, so together – it’s the perfect combination.